Sunday, September 23, 2007

Week 2 Aftermath: Seahawks 21, Bengals 17

There was anger. Then there were a couple phone calls. Now there's only silence. I feel comatose. Please bear with me for now while I regain for my sanity. The doctor says I should be speaking coherently again within 24 hours. For now, however, a few bullet points will have to do:

1. Special teams coach Darrin Simmons needs to be fired immediately. I don't care if you've got a bunch of hacks and practice squad guys out there on kickoffs. Kick the damn ball deep. Anything but telegraphing to the other teams that your coverage squad is so pathetic that you'd rather give them the ball at the 35-yard line than give them the chance of breaking one. I've never seen such blatant cowardice (i.e. stupidity) in the sport in my life--and this is coming from a team that likes to play prevent defense with a three-point lead and six minutes left.

2. Jonathan Joseph has gone from being one of my favorite players on the team to a sacrificial goat. The kid's got athleticism, but he falls asleep on coverage so often I think he should start taking pills for it.

3. What happened to Domata Peko? Something I'm going to look into, but see point 2. I don't think I've seen him in on any more than one play per game this season.

4. The Seahawks are a good team, but by no means were they unbeatable. Or great. Or even better than the Bengals, who have way more aberrations on their record than any above-average team should ever have. We've shot ourselves in the foot so many times that I wonder when we're going to run out of foot to shoot. What if we start shooting ourselves in the hand? Wouldn't we be unable to pull the trigger then? Just a thought.

To answer your question, yes, I'm out of my fucking mind.

I've got some things to take care of. I've got to take care of my fragile psyche right now, but there are probably about 50 pieces of a broken remote control scattered about my apartment right now, and by anal-rententive vacuum-at-three-in-the-morning roommate will probably throw a hissy fit if I don't clean it up before he gets back. Not to mention a faceplate I've got to retrieve from the courtyard after chucking it about as far as Hasselbeck's bomb to Deion Branch.

...

I think I'm going to be sick.